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A developmental programme teaching skills for coping with cancer.
After an initial operation to remove a tumour, David found a year later that the cancer had developed serious secondaries, which were inoperable. Put on a trial therapy, he then came to the Centre to help him cope with the fears and problems of having such an advanced cancer.
He has used many of the Centre’s services:
the relaxation and visualisation sessions were “a turning point – that was when it really turned around and I started to believe that I could live with cancer and not die from cancer”. Images that came up helped him to resolve issues that were causing him pain.
he was worried that the self-discovery group might be quite sad. Instead he finds it “actually very joyous”. Because there’s a pressure to protect loved ones, it’s not easy to be upfront with them all the time. The group gives him a chance to talk about his cancer with people in the same situation, and to share information and feelings.
his goal for counselling was to help him reduce the conflict within his mind: “it helped me to accept the different sides of my personality and to realise that everything is valuable in its own time and its own place”.
initially David was resistant to massage but, once he had tried it, he found that the benefits were “not just the relaxation and de-stressing but also a lot of self-acceptance and a feeling of being good to myself”.
One of the things that most impressed him was the atmosphere of care that pervades the Centre from the surroundings and the staff to the other users:
“The very first time I walked into the Centre I felt at home. The first thing they always do is to offer you a cup of tea, just like if you came to my home.
I’ve even had other Centre users who I’ve never met telephone and help me to find a particular book I was searching for or give me advice. This is the kind of service that you hope to get in your day-today life, but never do.”
David says that his wife has been amazed by how revitalised and full of energy he has become.
“In the old days, if there was something difficult in my life, I just couldn’t face it so I would fall asleep in my chair and just hope it would go away. Now I’ve got a lust for life and I want to get the most out of my life however much of it there is left.
In general, I feel a bit of a fraud because people don’t really believe I am ill. I look too healthy. I feel too healthy. So only good things have come out of my cancer really. It has made me value every day, which is a real gift.”